If my house ever gets robbed, I’m betting the burglars will be sorely disappointed – unless they were librarians in a past life. It’s pretty much full of books and not much else. I love to read. (My Mom, Dad, and Nana are the same way, so perhaps it’s genetic.)

Recently, I realized that I wasn’t getting as much out of my books as I could be. I would complete one and move on to the next, without always taking the time to digest the primary lesson or apply the principles.

Going forward, I decided that I would trade quantity for quality. My goal for 2012 is to read only 50 books, but to ensure that each has an impact on my life. I also want to share what I’m learning so that you can apply it too if you’re interested. I believe that our world is experiencing major shifts that will create tremendous opportunities for anyone willing to seize it. (More on that here and here.)

Getting specific, I will complete a “Net-Out” for each significant book I read. For my template, I borrowed heavily from two leaders I admire: Michael Hyatt and Derek Sivers. Both are very gracious in sharing what they’ve learned and “how” they learn it.

In setting up my system, I created a simple Google Form to complete for each book. Click here to see what it looks like. (Also, here’s a quick tutorial on how to set up a form. It’s super easy.)

I also wanted to share my first example. I just finished Ikigai by Sebastian Marshall.

Quick Summary:

This book gripped me in the first few pages. In the introductory chapter, he describes people-watching at a train station in a Japanese suburb. He describes their ordinary, happy lives. And then two lines jump off the page. “I think, this is what I’m giving up. I don’t get to have this.” In that moment, I understood. I’ve felt that exact same way, but never found the words for it.

Written in a stream of consciousness style and organized by topic, the book has some repetitive sections. But they don’t distract from the power of the message and tactics found within. For those of us that often feel like aliens in a foreign land, the articulation of previously undescribed emotions is simply life-altering.

Key Insight #1:

You can have a “normal” life or a significant one, not both. This is a huge realization for me. As Marshall says, “If you keep taking all those edges that no one else will, pretty soon your neighbors [or Facebook friends] don’t understand you, can’t understand you.”

Key Insight #2:

Do things for reasons. Recognize how often I do things “because that’s the way it’s done” or based on my first impulse. For me, this realization dovetails nicely with the concept of automaticity. To direct our robot-selves, Marshall suggests two questions. 1) What is my objective here? 2) What course of action makes me most likely to reach that objective?

Key Insight #3:

Weekly reviews don’t have to be completed each week.  A “week” can include more or fewer days, depending on the circumstances. The key to this process is to be reviewing your goals and projects regularly and to gather feedback often enough to make adjustments proactively.

Key Insight #4:

Start your day in your planner as opposed to your email. I know this. We all know this. But we slip. Marshall shared a neat trick about how he’d turn off his laptop and then turn it upside down each night. It forced enough of a pause each morning for him to remember to review his planner first.

Key Insight #5:

Environment matters. Marshall shares, “You can get pretty big pushes from moving your environment around to suit your goals and life.” I get this. It’s why I switched to a standing desk. I need to do more in this area.

Personal Application:

Be at peace with being weird. Don’t hide it, and don’t judge others for being normal.

Make adjustments to my Weekly Review Form and Process. 1) Allow for natural breaks, as opposed to forcing 7 days. 2) Add fields to capture the begin and end dates for the “week” and the percent of days compliance for each tracked goal behavior (like flossing).

Create some barriers to checking email early in the day. Planning my day the night before is helping tremendously. If I get really gutsy, I’ll remove it from my phone completely.

Even after I grasped the revelation that action leads to motivation (not the other way around), I still wasn’t out of the “mud.” I knew I needed to take action, but I often couldn’t bring myself to do it. Often, I was literally stuck.

Then something very odd happened yesterday morning.

My alarm went off at 5:15 am, as normal. I turned it off and snuggled underneath the covers, convincing myself that I needed an extra hour of sleep more than I needed to workout. After all, I was tired. (It’s been a brutal few months by any standards, and I’ve got at least another 30 days of this pace.)

Then I found myself in the kitchen at 5:35, getting a spoonful of almond butter and a banana. I don’t even remember the minutes in between. Getting in the car at 5:40, it dawned on me what really happened.

My habits took over.

Your Life is Your Habits

Science tells us that the great majority of what we do each day is based on habit, not goal-directed thought. Stress makes it even more likely that our habits will take over.

In previous phases of my life, it’s caused me too eat too much, drink incredible amounts of soda, and park myself in front of the television for hours. I’ve even created a “checking in” loop that can turn any device into a time-eating machine: Facebook, Twitter, Email, RSS Feeds, Repeat. Or, I can’t be the only person that always eats to the bottom of the bag or cleans my plate. It happens automatically; I don’t even think about it until it’s over.

It’s called “automaticity,” and we’ve all experienced it. We use it when we ride a bicycle or drive a car, as our instincts take over and we don’t have to think through every single motion.  Most of us also trigger it with many of our consumption behaviors: eating, internet, television, etc.

Think about that. Frankly, I find it scary when I realize how robotic I am.

Then I realized that I can choose whether I want to be a good robot or a bad robot.

Your New Superpower

Here’s the real secret: we can train ourselves to apply automaticity to anything we want.

Behaviorial scientists like BJ Fogg have been studying this human phenomenon for decades. They’ve even figured out exactly how to develop it.

To me, that means I can turn my habits into automatic jumper cables.

I know that action leads to motivation, which creates a cycle of more action. And I also know that I can use my habits to cause the first action to happen automatically.

Sounds like a pretty nifty superpower to me, one that’s available to every single one of us.

How will you use yours?

Falling down sucks, particularly if you’ve climbed a little higher since the last time you fell down. It hurts more. The bruises and scrapes are little deeper.

Then the mental games begin. And they’re far worse than the physical ones.

You did it before. Why can’t you now?

Lots of other people don’t let this stop them.

You’re just lazy and want a shortcut. You’re not willing to put in the effort.

All true in weak moments, but not reflective of the real you.

It feels like being stuck in mud as far as you can see. It takes all your strength to simply stand up, and then there’s no clear path out. It’s frustrating and exhausting.

What to do?

• Sit and mope for a while, waiting for the motivation to do more.
• Repeat several times.
• Realize that’s not helping.
• Decide to do something – anything.

As the Japanese Proverb says: Fall down 7, get up 8. It’s really that simple.

Not easy by any stretch, but simple.

As I was wallowing in the mud, I remembered a book I’d read several months ago. (In fact, I’d read it in DFW Airport as I was getting over being groped by the TSA. Another “mud” moment.)

Something in the back of my mind recalled the general concept of the diagram below.

In The 1% Solution, Tom Connellan offers a twist on the general view of motivation leading to action.  What if the reverse is the real truth? Connellan proposes that, “The more you get done, the more motivated you are to do things. So you do more things, and you get even more motivated. It’s a self-feeding cycle.”

I decided to try it. In fact, I’m doing that today.

I don’t “feel” like writing. I “feel” overwhelmed with all that’s going on in my life, mostly positive, but some big challenges too. To tell you the truth, I outlined this post a week ago, and it’s taken me all that time to overcome the resistance to finish and publish it. I can”t really explain the pushback, but it’s certainly there.

Step one for me is simply starting again.

Is there a first step you need to take today too?

Sometimes the greatest obstacle to moving forward is looking backwards. We cling to the memories of our good ‘ol days, linking our identity to a past success.

Maybe it was winning an athletic championship in high school or college, or maybe even a single incredible play. Maybe it was a position with inside access to movers and shakers. Maybe it was a work project that mirrored the case studies you read in college. Maybe it was earning more than you’d ever dreamed of for a period of time.

We often talk of learning from our failures and putting them behind us. The same is true of our successes.

Here are three ways success can be a trap, and how to escape them.

1. Clinging to the old identity prevents us from being open to a new one.

Failure’s hard, but success is far more dangerous. If you’re successful at the wrong thing, the mix of praise and money and opportunity can lock you in forever. – Po Bronson

In a well-known example of this, performer Jay-Z admitted being addicted to the thrill of drug dealing. ”You become addicted to the feeling, the uncertainty and adrenaline and danger of that lifestyle,” Jay-Z told Oprah. He even made preparations to return to the streets in case his music career didn’t work out.

Every wantrapreneur that has let lifestyle creep prevent them leaving a salaried position to pursue their dreams can probably relate to this one as well. Each time our pay increases, the cycle continues. More pay leads to more house, more cars, more toys or clothes, and those lead to more focus on getting even more pay. Even if you weren’t successful at the “wrong” thing, being locked in to an old identity can still be a trap.

To escape, the first step is to simply recognize that you’re in the grasp and dissect it. Identify the constraints one by one and create a plan to remove them. It may take a while, but there’s not much worth pursuing more than freedom.

2. Recycling a particular doctrine or approach may not be effective in a changing world.

Success is dangerous. One begins to copy oneself, and to copy oneself is more dangerous than to copy others. It leads to sterility. – Pablo Picasso

In layman’s terms, we call this a “rut.” And relying on what worked in the past may be the quickest way to fall into one, particularly if you focus on the tactics as opposed to the strategy. Here’s a great example from Jonathan Fields about companies telling us of a “special offer” right after we decide to cancel their service. It might have worked when our only method of communication was the phone, but it doesn’t translate well to the web (where tons of comparative information is at our fingertips).

Personally, this is one I’ve struggled with. My old thinking told me that the most important ingredients for building a business were a great idea and enough money. I’d seen that approach be successful, for myself and others. Now, I’m convinced that a lack of money can be an ideal constraint, forcing you to test your ideas with customers very early in the process. (If you struggle with this one too, read this, this, and this.)

To escape this trap, you’ll need to continually assess and update your skills and perspective. There’s nothing more dangerous than not knowing what we don’t know. Previous successes can camouflage this incompetence very well.

3. Focusing on the fear of losing what we’ve gained narrows our thinking and makes us unreasonably risk averse.

Don’t be afraid to give up the good to go for the great. – Kenny Rogers

This one’s similar to the first two traps, but particularly insidious. In this case, we know we’re trapped, but we’re scared of encountering a even bigger trap (even though that rarely happens).

We can’t get past the flinch. As Julien Smith shares in his book of the same name, “whatever form it takes, the flinch is there to support the status quo. It whispers in your ear so you’ll dismiss a good idea that requires a lot of change.” (Download it; it’s free.)

To escape this one, you’ll need to lean into your fears. And you’ll need to embrace discomfort; it’s your friend. It means you’re growing again.

For most of my twenties, I had horrible pain in my hands and forearms. Sometimes it was a steady ache, sometimes a shooting pain, and sometimes it just felt like I was on fire from the elbows down. I’ve had all the tests and lived on Celebrex for a while. (Whoever invented the test for Carpal Tunnel Syndrome deserves a special episode of Alias just for them.) It really was never diagnosed as anything specific, and I eventually quit seeking traditional medical care for it.

Once I started working out regularly and eating better, it mostly went away.

Until the last ten days or so.

Lately, my thumb and index finger on my right hand are unhappy again. I’m pretty sure it’s from overuse.

My renewed focus on writing has meant lots more time at the keyboard. But it’s clear that’s not sustainable.

What to do?

In the past, I would only see two roads: keep going and ignore the pain (which only works temporarily) or stop altogether.

Today, I think I see another way. I can acknowledge my weakness and its limitations. Come up with a plan to address them. Test it, and repeat until I find a solution.

So, first thing. I’m going to take a few days off to see if the inflammation will settle down. (This means I also have to stay off my mobile devices too, which could be tough.)

Then, I’m going to try using verbal dictation more.

I’ve always resisted that approach as I’m a very visual person. I’ve always said that I needed to see the words on the page. I’m thinking that self-imposed limitation may rank right up there with the one that said I could only write in the morning. The month of November proved that one was silly.

If you have any tips for using dictation more effectively in your work, I’d love to hear about it.

I’m also very interested in the scripts we tell ourselves. If you have one that helps you address challenges in a healthy way, I’d love to know about that too. It would be fantastic if you would share it in the comments below.

If we were running a 5K or marathon, we wouldn’t dream of stopping just inches before the finish line. We know that the rewards come with finishing, and there’s not much else that tops that surge of confidence and pride in ourselves.

So why don’t we carry that philosophy into our work? I’m guilty of avoiding it too.

When the finish line approaches on a consulting contract, we start to brainstorm ways to extend it, often sabotaging ourself or our colleagues.

Or, if we’re an employee, we cling to projects for the job security they seemingly provide. We’re not willing to automate them, cutting the needed hours in half. Or to create a checklist and train a more junior person to complete them.

Why?

Because we often operate from a position of fear, not faith. We’re afraid that there might not be more work on the other side of the finish line. We’re afraid there’s not enough pie to go around.

But once we start crossing the line, we realize that fear doesn’t hold up.

Our world economy circulates over $62 trillion each year – or $169 billion each day. And it needs finishers more than ever.

Just as crossing the finish line of that race carries significant benefits, so does crossing it at work.

1. You gain confidence. This one alone is worth your weight in gold. Gains in self-confidence have been shown to improve your overall performance, happiness, and even your health.

2. You allow someone else to grow. By growing yourself, you make room for someone else to occupy the space you once did. Instead of keeping the same project for a decade, master it, and then teach.

3. There is always another layer of value to add. Maybe your job is to process invoices, and that currently takes 40 hours per week. If you can streamline it and get it down to 30 hours per week, perhaps you can use that extra day to negotiate lower prices or look for other opportunities to reduce expenses. Do that without prompting a few times, and you’ll soon have a raise to boot.

4. No one can ever take away your medals. Your job could be eliminated or your project could end, but nothing can take away the results you achieved. That story becomes a part of your fabric, available for weaving into whatever pattern you’re creating whether it’s a resume, LinkedIn profile, or sales call.

5. Most importantly, finishers are never on the sidelines long. Inevitably, doors start opening. Once you gain a track record as a finisher, your challenge will be deciding which projects to decline. Organizations can’t survive without consistently delivering value, and it takes people like you to do just that.

What finish line are you avoiding? Make a plan today to cross it.

Count me as a member of Team Tebow. I’m a fan, and I’ve certainly enjoyed the last few weeks of improbable victories.

He’s certainly made football more exciting and provided an excellent role model for living out the Christian faith. But there’s more we can learn from his example. And I think the lessons translate to more than the football field.

Here’s what Tim Tebow can teach us about business:

1. Be patient, and be prepared.

In high school, college, and the NFL, Tebow arrived as the underdog, frequently facing criticism for not fitting the standard mold. Too big. Not fast enough. Odd throwing motion. Renowned analyst Mel Kiper even said that he didn’t have the “intangibles” needed to succeed in the NFL. Starting a business is often very similar. The situation is rarely perfect, and there’s usually plenty of people ready to tell you why you won’t succeed.

In these situations, lots of folks (including me at times) choose to complain about how hard or unfair it is. Refusing to take that road, Tebow gave us the map for a much healthier alternative.

He arrives at the practice facility at 5:45 a.m. to lift weights before meetings, and doesn’t leave until about 8:30 p.m. When the players run suicide sprints after practice, Tebow finishes first every time. He is always the last player off the field.
- excerpted from the Palm Beach Post

2. For leaders, authenticity and consistency matter.

Few of us face a level of scrutiny anywhere near Tebow’s, but it is important for us to note that others are likely watching to see if our deeds match our words.

Are we faking it? Or are we the same person at the microphone and behind closed doors?

He doesn’t try to be anything more than what he is. And he walks around here and he’s comfortable in his own skin, and you can tell that. Like I said, there’s nothing fake about him. He’s not trying to be something that he’s not. And he’s just being himself.
- teammate Eddie Royal

3. Never, ever give up.

Down 10 with 4 minutes to go. Failures in the previous 11 possessions. Many would have given up, deciding victory was out of reach. Tebow and the Broncos did not, earning their 6th straight win.

I’ve said similar experiences in launching online products, and it’s very tempting to throw in the towel. Failing over and over again is painful. But it can also be powerful feedback, helping us to eliminate ineffective options and learn more about our obstacles.

“I think, referring to that last drive, I think it was just a bunch of guys that kept fighting that had been knocked down a bunch of times but continued to get back up. I’m just so proud of those guys, for their resiliency, their patience and their determination.”
- Tebow, after the Jets game

4. Pray and give thanks in every situation.

Tebow reminds us that God will accompany us anywhere we’re willing to invite him, whether it’s the locker room or the board room. If he’s not with us in a particular situation, it’s because we turned away. He’s available on the sideline and in the sales call. We can pray whether those around us are celebrating, suffering, or just going about the busyness of their day.

Call it “Tebowing” if it you’d like.

I’m thankful to have a leader like Tebow that shows us how to bring the Bible to life.

Who else do you use as a role model? I’d love to hear about your mentors in the comments.

I used to think that there was an “it” to figure out, that one day everything would snap into place and make sense. I’d know my purpose and exactly how to fulfill it.

In search of that, I’d dip a toe, or maybe a calf, into something new, and then move on when it wasn’t perfect. I was committed, but there was always a part of me that held back. At the time, I wasn’t even aware that I was shielding myself, but it’s clear as day looking back. I wanted the certainty first.

Somewhere in the last couple of months, I’ve realized that it’s not likely to happen that way. But I’m not the least bit disappointed.

I’m learning about myself inch by inch, understanding that I needed to keep digging in the same place long enough. I’ve even learned to embrace the pain when it appears, noting that it’s often a false alarm or a signal to what I’m passionate about.

A book I read this week even gave me a name for what used to stop me every time: the flinch. Whatever form it takes, the flinch is there to support the status quo. It whispers in your ear so you’ll dismiss a good idea that requires a lot of change.

This line in particular reached out and grabbed me. It’s about how to determine when the fear you feel is fake.

You’ll know you’ve opened the right door when you feel a strong, irresistible impulse to do something else, anything else. This usually means that you’re right at the threshold of something important, and you need to pay attention and keep going – now.

I have a few projects that definitely fall into this category – one in particular. I’ll creep up to the line, only to let distraction or perceived fatigue get the best of me. I’ve done this multiple times over the last three years, but I never connected the dots. As Steve Jobs told us, you can only connect them looking backwards. At the brink, I flinched. Every. Single. Time.

Today, I have a name for my opponent, and a new attitude. I’m committed to gaining ground inch by inch, leaning in at the flinch.

——

If there’s a great work inside of you that hasn’t been birthed yet, read The Flinch by Julien Smith. He’s discovered the roadmap for doing the best work of your life.

Just yesterday, I had several conversations around the concept of constraints with my colleagues from different teams. Each of us were coming through situations where we initially viewed the limitations as negative, but soon came to appreciate the creativity and resolve they inspired.

This TedTalk from Graham Hill got me to thinking . . .

Can simply having a constraint increase the chances of a positive outcome? If so, what other ways can we inspire ourselves to create something amazing by using a radical constraint?

- Can our entire office fit in a backpack?

- Can we start (and test) a business with less than $250?

- Can we start (and test) a business in less than 40 hours?

- Can we have a fun day with the family without spending a dollar? Or maybe $10?

What do you think?

Maybe it’s the time of year or our recent discussions about raises and pay equity. I’ve really been paying attention to this topic lately.

In general, I think it’s healthy to always ask for feedback and let folks know that you’re always looking to grow. There is one way to fail before you even get started, and I’m still surprised at the number of people that use this approach.

Let’s talk about pie.

We all want more pie, and we have some choices about how to get it.

1. We can steal our neighbor’s pie – or guilt him into giving us a piece.

2. We can work harder to make more pie for ourselves.

3. We can develop a system that makes pie so that everyone around us gets more pie.

Here’s the results of each of those.

1. You might get some pie right now, but you’ve pretty much eliminated this as a future option for more pie.

2. You’ll get more pie for more efforts.

3. This approach almost always ensures that you never run out of pie.

There is plenty of pie. It’s your choice about how to get more.